I often hear people blaming circumstances for their failures or losses to stay where they are. I do not believe in circumstances. The people who get ahead in this world are the people who get up, and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, they TAKE ACTION and MAKE THEM.
We all know people who refuse to take accountability for their own actions. They blame others for their shortcomings, failures, and daily drama.
It’s very easy in hard times to become the ‘victim’, and to say “Why me?” and be distraught. But finding comfort in staying a victim is a personal choice.
As long as you think that the cause of your problem is “out there”—as long as you think that anyone or anything is responsible for your suffering — the situation is hopeless. It means that you are in denial, or that you do not recognize your magnificence and power to take action and change your circumstances. It means that you are forever in the role of victim, that you’re suffering because you choose to suffer; that you essentially take ‘pleasure’ in being and staying the victim.
Break free from the poisonous victim mentality and embrace the truth of your greatness. You were not meant for a mundane and sad life.
Yes, life can indeed break your body, take away your home, your family, relationship, or whatever it is that you hold dearly. But nothing can take away YOUR POWER to choose, unless you choose to relinquish your power to choose.
Nothing can break your Spirit.
Nothing can touch your Soul.
No one can take your freedom unless you allow it.
This is power…
Being a victim is a poor excuse to not live your full Divine potential. Who you really are is so much more than the powerless victim-moments that you might feel at times.
Holding onto being a victim is a cop out from owning your true magnificence and taking the actions necessary to follow your dreams and true happiness.
Playing the victim serves no one.
I believe strongly in taking responsibility for everything that occurs in your life. This is called FREE WILL: Your power to choose. But our minds are always looking for ways to avoid pain, failure and rejection, and so they’re constantly churning out rationalizations to keep us ‘impeccable’; it’s they who are wrong, not I; It is because of them, not me; It is because of this, it is because of that, never because of me, you say…
But when one practices taking responsibility for everything that happens in their life, you stop blaming others. It becomes less a question of blame and more a question of sacrifice. It is no longer their fault that you have been cheated on because they are “all cold-hearted women”; It is no longer their fault that you are in the position you are in because your past still haunts you; It is no longer their fault that you have fallen into deep life-long depression because someone was never there for you… Now it is your fault — and a question of whether YOU’re willing to sacrifice the extra effort or not to find a woman who isn’t “cold-hearted”, to focus on the present moment and build your future towards the position you wish to be in, to look for the people and circumstances that will bring you true happiness.
Taking responsibility and morphing blame into sacrifice EMPOWERS YOU. It puts the ball in your court and returns you to the healthy reality that the only person in this world who determines your success and failure is YOU.
The question of blame, responsibility and sacrifice is a profound one in relationships as well. Dysfunctional relationships almost always crumble under the pressure of one person blaming the other for their shortcomings or transgressions. There is a direct correlation between the amount of blame leveled between partners and their propensity to break up. Part of the recipe for a healthy and happy relationship is one where both partners take responsibility for their own emotions, actions, and their choice to commit to the other.
Make a conscious choice to commit to your goal, day in and day out. Take the risk of failing, as ‘failure’ will always be a possibility in any type of commitment, whether it involves a relationship, your career, or just life in general. In the end, you must make the conscious decision that you are willing to sacrifice the risk of being hurt, rejected, or overturned in order to enjoy the commitment of what you are pursuing.
So stop fashioning yourself a victim. The world is not conspiring to malign you. The world is pretty darn indifferent towards you. Take responsibility for your life and stop blaming those who don’t behave in the way you wish they behaved.
I personally, live by this principle. I make decisions, day in and day out. Decisions that have the potential to fail (or not). And each and every one of these decisions I wouldn’t take back. It has been my decision, it is my choice, therefore it is my responsibility…
Of all I’ve ever done, my each and every action and inaction, for those I’ve left behind, and those I still choose to keep in my life, for everything I’ve blessed, for anything I’ve wronged, for everything and anyone I’ve ever loved, I take responsibility.
Never be a victim of life; be it’s conqueror.
“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s can be a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently IF YOU LET IT. You, me, or no one is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can GET HIT and KEEP MOVING FORWARD.” —Rocky Balboa